I love all things business and entrepreneurship and creativity. I graduated with a degree in accounting and after several years working in the field, I ultimately turned down a great accounting salary to volunteer with no salary at an advertising agency while getting my MBA. I wanted to learn about marketing and advertising hands-on. Not long after, they offered me a job. Much less than my accounting salary, but it was an income and I was soaking in all of the new things to learn. I was a dreamer. I wrote business plans for fun on ideas that would pop in my head…just to see if they would work. It was a passion and love. I eagerly went after things I wanted and wasn’t afraid to jump in in unconventional ways. My mind always stirring with ideas I wanted to try.
But then life happened. Bigger financial responsibilities and kids and trading “going for it” for “playing it super safe.”. Then both of my kids were diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, which led to homeschooling. And suddenly life is busy in new ways. The flame barely visible in old dreams as new responsibilities demanded attention. It was a new and different (but good) season of life.
Fast forward to today and we still homeschool but my kids are older, more independent. It’s a new season where the old flames have been resurfacing, And it is fun, but scary and a little unnerving if I’m honest. I’m not as fearless, not as willing to make sacrifices, not as willing to try new things. Seasons have a way of changing us.
As someone who struggles to focus, going on long walks while listening to sermons or podcasts and worship music has become my favorite time to talk and listen to God. A month or so ago on one of these walks, I prayed that God would make me anxious for these walks. I wanted to keep it up both for my health and for this time with Him. It was a prayer more from my spirit than my mind. I remember thinking, “What in the world are you praying for? You do everything you can to avoid being anxious and now you are asking for it!” But God has beautifully responded. When I start feeling that stir of anxiety, I know it is time to get out and walk and talk it out with Him. He has made me anxious for the thing I know I need to get out and do. He is waiting for me on the other side of it. He wants to draw me to Him.
On my walk today, I started thinking about God making us anxious for those dreams He has placed in our hearts. And not to diminish any type of clinical anxiety at all. More of an unsettling. A feeling that we HAVE TO do something; that something needs to be moved on, not just thought about. I believe it can be a powerful tool to draw near to God where He can turn this anxiety into action. In seeking Him – with prayer, gratitude, and petition – we replace the anxiety with hope and vision. We acknowledge these desires He has given us and we can talk to Him about them. We can brainstorm and take steps toward these plans God has laid out for us and listen for His voice and wisdom.
So….what do you want God to make you anxious for? It’s a scary thought, isn’t it?! Because we will have to act. Going back to my earlier Corinthians post today, it is essentially us saying, “Yes! We are ready!”
God, make us anxious for the things You have laid before us…anxious for the relief and peace that comes from Your presence, Your hand at work, Your guidance as we take steps down new paths. Turn our anxiety into beautiful action.